Honest Assessment: The Jagged Little Pill

During this time of reflection, I am spending it focusing on my growth and development as a person.  I felt led to ask some close friends and colleagues to conduct an assessment on me.  My hope is to take their words, reflect on them and mediate on them via conversations with God.  I do a lot of self reflecting and analyzing, however sometimes our perception of ourselves (good and bad) is not the self we project or give to the world.  I do assessments with students and alumni all the time and most of the time these assessments (personality, interest, strengths etc) are based around their career development/exploration but some times I encounter someone who wants to reassess their major/career choices and receive a "reality check" about those choices.  I am working with a senior now, who's graduating in about five weeks or so, who wants to reassess her career choice.  Pretty brave and scary stuff.  After we debriefed, I asked her if her assessment reveals something that is total outside of what she is currently studying/wanting to go into now, does she plan to do anything about it.   Of course she had to think about it.  It is one thing to want clarity/feedback, but it is a whole other matter deciding what we will do with that information, if anything AND are we READY for it.


It is so important that we do assessments like this not just with people who love us and know us but with people who have only known us for a short time (on my to do list).  It serves as that "reality check" to our life choices and purposes.  It also provides us with positive points about who we are to the world.  However, we must be ready to "receive" the information being shared with us AND we must know what, if anything, we will do with the information once we have it.


I must be honest, I was nervous about the responses I would get and my heart would beat fast every time I got a email entitled Re: Self-Assessment (YIKES).  As a person who struggles with fear and taking risks I analyzed why I was willing to take this risk (this is something I am focusing on in general because there is no rhyme or reason as to why I will take some risk but waiver on others - more to come on that).   There's no shrugging the ones you love off as "haters" LOL. For me it was a nudge from within and when that happens I have the courage/faith to move on that nudge in most cases.


SIDE BAR: After I reread this for editing I saw that I might have found my "rhyme/reason" to my risk taking methods.  Bah Humbug!  The favorite word of one of my close friends - typically said when she knows I am right but she doesn't want me to be..LOL.  Kind of strange typing out the analysis/ah ha moments that usually goes on in my head.


Again, the point of my assessment was to see others perception of me.  What "me" was I giving the world? Was that the "me" God intended me to be/give?  Was that the "me" I wanted to be/give?  I was slapped HARD in the face by some of the perceptions.  I prayed, received and swallowed my jagged little pill (shout out to Alanis Morissette - still love her!).  I was/am ready to do something with the information.


I told my student to think about it and make a follow up appointment IF she was ready to receive the information that MAY come from the assessment.  No pressure.  We have an appointment next week*smile*.


If you are interested in seeing the message and simple questions I sent out to garner my feedback, I have included it below.  Please feel free to use as is or tweak it to fit your needs.  I left my questions more open as to allow the person to flow in any direction they liked, however they felt compelled to respond.  The key here is to make sure you are receiving what you need to know/assess and that you are ready for the information.

As I go through this season of reflection, spiritual discipline and becoming more focus and centered on Christ and in general, I am doing reflections for self improvement.  I feel called to ask others to assess me.  Sometimes we have a perspective of ourselves (good and bad) that may or may not be in line with who we present ourselves to be to others.  With that being said, I want to ask you as a person close to me to provide me with the following:

Why do you allow me in your life?
What are my strengths (in general from your perspective)?
What are my challenges (in general from your perspective)?

Please be as honest as you can.  This is not or will not be a reflection on our relationship.  This is 100% about me.  I trust your thoughts and will use your feedback as part of my reflections and conversations with God. 

Being mindful of your time, if I could have a response before Easter that would be great.

Thank you so much for helping me. 

Love Nika